A Journey of Empowerment and Representation
When Andrea Razali returned from competing in Miss International Queen in 2020—often referred to as the trans equivalent of Miss Universe—her mental health took a significant hit.
“The pressure for trans women is incredibly high,” shares the model and entrepreneur. “I never aspired to be part of a beauty pageant, but I joined because I wanted to elevate my advocacy efforts.”
Over the past few years, Andrea has emerged as a prominent advocate for trans rights in Singapore, and representing her community on an international stage felt like a natural progression. Although the Miss International Queen platform was one of the biggest opportunities of her career, she left feeling disheartened. The Singaporean media largely overlooked her achievement, she received minimal support from trans allies, and she faced immense pressure to conform to specific beauty standards during the competition.
“At the end of the day, a beauty pageant is a business. So when you work tirelessly for a crown and don’t win, you feel like just another statistic,” she reflects.
Andrea highlighted the tragic story of former Miss USA, Cheslie Kryst, who took her own life, emphasizing the profound pressures faced by pageant contestants.
“Many participants enter these competitions seeking a platform, yet the burden of perfectionism is something we must confront,” she elaborates. “People will always find something to critique—be it our appearance, attire, or intelligence. Imagine being judged that way daily. I never understood this pressure until I became Miss International Queen Singapore.”
From Beauty Pageant to Business Leader
When I last spoke with Andrea in 2020, she expressed doubts about the efficacy of beauty pageants in promoting trans rights awareness.
“Picture being in a room with 25 trans women, each with an incredible story, yet no one seems to care,” she recounted. “During the pageant, I saw my peers being treated poorly, and despite our struggles, society only values how beautiful we appear.”
Following her experience at Miss International Queen, Andrea set out to ensure a broader representation of trans women in the media—not just those thriving in beauty and entertainment, but also those succeeding in business and family roles.
Meeting with Andrea again a year later, I discovered that this goal was already materializing.
Starting with herself, Andrea now works as a para-counsellor, holds a corporate job, and is pursuing a master’s degree in psychology. However, our conversation centered around her recent appointment as the National Director of Miss Equality World, a new international beauty pageant.
“Didn’t you intend to leave the industry altogether? How did you end up running a pageant?” I asked.
“I was tired of being one of the few trans women in the spotlight here in Singapore,” she admitted. “After my time at Miss International Queen, I realized the value of such platforms. I wanted to provide similar opportunities for other trans women.”
“Before transitioning, I longed for more trans role models. When I became Miss International Queen, numerous young people approached me, stating I was their role model. While I’ve always wanted to advocate for trans women, I felt frustrated that only my narrative was highlighted when so many others deserved to be heard.”
Introducing Miss Equality World Singapore
Qatrisha Zairyah Bte Kamsi became the inaugural winner of Miss Equality World Singapore. Arriving for our interview and photoshoot in a fitted dress and heels, she exuded poise. Her appearance was striking, but her genuine and soft-spoken nature shone through.
“As a child, I loved wearing my sister’s clothes and putting on my mother’s lipstick,” Qatrisha shared when I asked about her journey to understanding her identity as a trans woman. “One day when I was five, my mother dressed me as a girl and reassured me that, regardless of my identity, I would always be her child. She and my grandmother were incredibly supportive.”
Qatrisha never had a dramatic ‘coming out’ moment; her supportive family allowed her to transition gradually.
I expressed how rare it is to meet individuals in the LGBTQ+ community with positive coming-out stories, noting that as journalists, we often focus on narratives of trauma.
Qatrisha’s experience is vastly different yet equally valid. She grew up in a supportive environment, found love in her national service, transitioned, married, secured a full-time job, and now resides in her BTO flat with her partner.
However, as she peeled back the layers of her past, it became clear that her success was not merely due to luck but also to her choices in prioritizing her happiness amid challenges.
Her stepfather disapproved of her identity, and she admitted she hadn’t shared her transition, marriage, or Miss Equality World win with him. Consequently, her mother and grandmother could not attend the award ceremony.
Her husband’s family also resisted their marriage. They initially lived with them but were eventually compelled to move out due to disagreements. At the time, Qatrisha worked as a retail assistant while her boyfriend was still serving in national service. Despite their financial struggles, they managed to afford a small rented room.
“My mother was incredibly helpful,” Qatrisha said. “She would send us food when we were unable to afford it. She taught me the essence of motherhood and showed me the meaning of unconditional love.”
The Need for Authentic Trans Role Models
Andrea witnessed backstage culture during Miss International Queen, where contestants engaged in botox injections, excessive estrogen use, and risky surgeries to enhance their appearances.
“They just wanted to look their best on the final night,” she recalled, emphasizing the health risks some contestants faced.
Determined not to perpetuate such standards at Miss Equality World Singapore, Andrea made it a point to prioritize personality and commitment as key judging criteria, alongside beauty.
Like Qatrisha, Antasha Zahra Ulhaq, the 20-year-old runner-up of Miss Equality World, has undergone minimal cosmetic procedures. She is bubbly and energetic yet often feels the need to compose herself in Andrea’s nurturing presence.
“A true Gen Z kid,” as Andrea affectionately describes her.
Antasha has garnered a sizable social media following due to her humor. However, she confessed to facing immense pressure to conform to beauty standards within the trans community.
“It’s part of our gender dysphoria—some days you feel confident, while other days you feel vulnerable,” she admitted. “When those moments hit, you begin to question your appearance and contemplate all the aspects of yourself that you could change.”
“Joining the beauty pageant ironically boosted my confidence more than any procedure could. Even without surgeries, making it this far proves to me that I am enough as I am.”
“You have to find happiness within yourself first. Being content inside is crucial; otherwise, external changes won’t bring you true satisfaction.”
Empowering Others
“I enjoy uplifting others because I’ve been supported by many during my struggles,” Andrea reflects as we discuss how beauty pageants can be empowering yet exclusive.
“The gratitude that comes with that is far more fulfilling than making everything about me.”
“I wanted to create opportunities for other girls. It may seem like a mere two minutes of crowning, but it can change a young woman’s future forever. You see me today? I wouldn’t be who I am without that crown. It gave me confidence beyond measure.”
Though Miss Equality World Singapore is a smaller pageant compared to many globally, it serves as a significant source of empowerment for the trans women competing and for the broader trans community in Singapore.
Witnessing Qatrisha don her crown reminded me of a scene in Netflix’s “Pose,” where Angel, dressed in a wedding gown, marries her boyfriend, Papi. The series portrays the tragic realities of the trans community during the AIDS crisis in New York City, and lead actress Michaela Jaé Rodriguez became the first trans actress to win a Golden Globe Award.
In the season finale, amidst a backdrop of tragedies, Angel expresses gratitude to her community for teaching her the true meaning of family.
“I realize how incredibly rare it is for girls like us to be the romantic lead in any story,” she shares. “To have the prince and the fairytale. I know I may be the first to walk down this aisle, but I refuse to be the last.”
Like Angel, Qatrisha’s victory at Miss Equality World Singapore represents a beacon of hope for trans individuals, illustrating that a supportive community is ready to champion them as they pursue their dreams.
